I am not a knight in shining armor but a killer with an unbreakable fervor

Let me start off by saying this... "WHO THE HELL AM I?" No, I do not have amnesia (for those of you who worry). After today's class, I have been thinking of myself and where my issues and values lie. All of it stems from my courage or lack of in certain situations. Even as a martial artist and swordsman (yes I do sword play, shocker isn't it) I have my doubts and fears, especially when I was younger. I'd always put on a brave face for my friend back in the days of my youth but I was scared too. I was told at a young age that I would be alienated if I acted the way I did, but I was myself. Was there a problem with that? Was myself not right? Because when it boils down to the nitty gritty you are yourself, when life hits you like a train, the mask you wear isn't going to protect you, the cardboard cut-out of your greatest desires isn't going to block it for you because it's yourself who takes the brunt and I've learned to steel myself. Insults roll off my shoulder because why should I bow down to someone who gets their inspiration from a magazine cover or television? I'm the best person in the entire world because I'm a first rate version of myself. My mother (the possible stem of my issues) would always pin the blame on the things that happen in life on me. Yah, I'm not exactly Mr. Perfect but some of the things are just plain ridiculous. I was repressed, oppressed. My mom thought I couldn't be successful because I couldn't play an instrument, for 10 years, she has held this "grudge" to me, but I'm perfectly successful being me, that is being a martial artist (on my 18th birthday I would have performed approximately 10,000 hours of martial arts, mastering it), a swordsman (I'm like Picasso with a Zweihander). So go ahead people, hit me with the worst you got, I got myself and what do you got?